Sarah Brennan Funny & Fabulous Blog

If I were history, I would educate the people to care for each other nicely. I would put Obama and Martin Luther King Jr. together, To free the black people altogether. If I were history, I would instruct those cruel rulers not to treat people fiercely. I would ask Qin Shi Huang to read the Bible, So the scholars could still be in Chinese History.

Third Place: Sam Massey, Year 3, Chatsworth International School Orchard Campus, 8 years old for a brilliant effort about a crocodile!

So I sing in detention

Raindrops 

If you were a cloud,

And I was the rain

I’d slip from your arms,

To the Earth without pain.

I’d fall to the ground,

Riding winds along the way,

Waiting for the sun to shine,

So rise back to you I may.

Svetlana FERNANDES, Kowloon Junior School, Class 4, 8 years old, for her clever free verse using great imagination:

If…

If there were clouds of pink, orange and moss,

Would they taste like peaches or candy-floss?

If there was a cat and a dog floating in an ice-park

Would they say – grrr…or brrr…?

What if I lived in flowers and books,

Gee…What fun to sip nectar and eat out of a cookbook!

Just if you will,

“If” can give your imagination wings!

Noyonika Chatterjee, Kowloon Junior School, Class 4, 8 years old for another terrific effort from a younger poet!

If I were an alien

If I were an alien,

I would love to be like ET.

Although he was very cute,

I would surely be very pretty!

It would be great to own a space ship,

And fly around in space.

In my mission to find a magic potion,

To make Planet Earth a Happy Place!

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CLEVER COMPETITION NUMBER SEVEN: A MOST UNUSUAL CHRISTMAS STORY

Well, Christmas will never be the same again! What weird and wonderful Christmases you all wrote about…funny ones, sad ones, kind ones, scary ones, but most of all, ones that were very strange indeed! There were 33 entries from 7 schools in Hong Kong and Singapore, with stories about everything from witches to flying socks, zombie giants and  hamster elves! As for poor old Santa…there were Santas dressed in very strange outfits, Santas riding Harley Davidsons, missing Santas and wicked thieving Santas. But most of all, there were aliens…

There were entries from kids as young as 5 and as old as 11, so once again there are two age groupings, the first from 5  to 7 and the second from 8 to 11. The winners were decided on the basis of writing style, imagination and originality, and relative ages were taken into account. In each group, there was one winner who will receive a signed copy of one of my books, three runners-up, and a special mention for some of the youngest entrants.

Age group 5 to 7 years

Congratulations to Parul Methi, Mimi Tseng and Kavisha Mahtani, all of Kowloon Junior School, for their excellent entries. Keep on writing!

The winners in this age group are:

First place: Lucas Platter, Grade 2, Singapore American School, aged 7

Congratulations to Lucas for his well-constructed, funny story about a friendly alien invasion from the Planet Org!

Over Invasion

It was one week till Christmas. Everybody was excited.  Meanwhile on planet Org, aliens were hatching evil plans.  “Which planet should we invade first?  Mars, Earth or Jupiter?” said one alien.  “Let’s invade Earth.  It sounds ugly” said another alien.

Meanwhile back on Planet Earth, a boy named Joe was talking to his friend about how excited he was.  “This year for Christmas I think I’m getting an iPad” said Joe.  That night the aliens started to invade Earth.  They thought to themselves while they were flying from Planet Org to Earth on a carrot, “How can we invade earth?”  One alien said “Let’s pretend to be a kid.” “Good idea” said another alien.  When they got to earth it was 11:59pm 3 days before Christmas.

The next day the aliens went to a school and said they were new kids.  One alien said “I’m Shometoy Kaza from Slowlampul.”    Another alien said “I’m Wopodady Kamona from Slowlampul.”  The last alien said “I’m Korpoz Shobodo also from Slowlampul.” During the day the three aliens noticed that all the children were wearing Santa Hats.  They thought to themselves “And tomorrow they are going to wear Santa hats and Santa Shirts.”

The next day the three aliens wore Santa Hats and Santa Shirts, but nobody else did – the other kids just wore Santa Hats.  But one kid was wearing a full Santa Suit.  At recess the aliens found out that the kid’s name was Joe.  Joe came over to one of the aliens and said “Hey, Shometoy do you want to play with me?”  “You too Wopodady and Korpoz.”  “What do you want to play” said Joe?  “Tag, hide and seek or races?”  “I’d like to do races” said Wopodady. “What kind of races do you want to do?” said Joe.  “Let’s do flying carrot races.”  Joe responded “What are flying carrot races?” “It’s when you get on a humongous carrot and race each other from one turnip to another turnip.  The first person that can get through both turnips wins.”  “That sounds fun” Joe said.

“Bring on the carrots” said Wopodady.  Then three humongous carrots and 2 humongous turnips came flying down.  Korpoz said “Press this little red button to move and steer on the front of the carrot.”  A boy named Luke was suspiciously watching Wapodady, Korpoz and Shometoy.  When they finished the race, Korpoz won, Joe was in second, Wapodady was in third and Shometoy was last.  When Korpoz won the race, he went running from the second turnip upside down to the first turnip and jumped in it and started eating it.  Then he told Joe and that the winner of the races gets to eat the turnips. Then Joe and Wopodady jumped into the second turnip and started eating it.

Meanwhile, on the swings, Bob, the smartest kid in class, said “You know what? I think Wapodady, Korpoz and Shometoy are aliens trying to invade planet earth.  Then Wapodady, Korpoz and Shometoy thought “Why do we want to invade planet earth?”  Joe said, “If they’re aliens or not, I like them!”  Everyone lived happily ever after except Luke – he had a very hard life.

Second place: Julian Turver, Class 3C Kowloon Junior School, aged 7

Congratulations to Julian for his beautifully-written and very imaginative story about a goblin Christmas:

Goblin Christmas

Nothing except the wind was heard.  In goblin town a small breeze was glinting with snow flakes in the sunlight.  The houses were covered in snow.  They were like towers of ice.  Shooting stars were sprinting from side to side.  The forest near goblin town was dripping icicles.  The trees were Christmas trees.  The snowmen were as thin as thin pencils and the heads were as big as houses.

Sig Nig the goblin was heating beside the warm fire.  The fire was making magical horses out of the sparks and fire lions.  His Christmas sock was gold and silver with ten chains in the middle.  His house was a crane shape.  Sig Nig had brown eyes, ten noses and red hair.  He had woken up on Christmas Eve but there was no snow so he thought about who would do this.

He looked into his magic name book.  Then a fire monster with blue eyes rose from the ground. So Sig Nig got out his never-ending sword and his ice sword and at that moment he chopped off the monster’s head and icicles came down to make snow.  He was shining in the moonlight. Then it began to snow and the monster sank into the road. On Christmas morning no one knew who made it snow. But Sig Nig did because he did it, so while people were thinking Sig Nig just smiled.

Third place : Justin Sung, Class 2R, Kowloon Junior School, aged 7

Aaagh! Another alien Christmas! Only this time it starts at a Pizza Hut!

Ben 10 Christmas Fun

It was Christmas Day.  Ben, Gwen and Kevin were eating pizza and drinking juice in Pizza Hut.  Suddenly the ground shook.

“That’s weird!” said Ben.

When everyone was running crazily, all three went out of the restaurant.  It was a giant spaceship that crashed the ground.  Out went 100 DNAliens.

“It’s hero time!” shouted Ben.

Ben slapped his ultimatrix and turned into Terraspin.  Terraspin used his wind power to crush the DNAliens over while Kevin and Gwen were fighting the forever knights.  After smashing all the DNAliens and the forever knights, Terraspin turned back to Ben.  At this time, the bad guy Abbegor came out.

“You’re busted.” said Abbegor.

“Oh Man!  My ultimatrix is recharging, I cannot turn to any alien now” said Ben.

“Maybe smashing time!” yelled Kevin.

“Stop! Don’t fight alone!” said Ben. But it was too late.  Kevin was already fighting Abbegor!

Suddenly, there was a sound “BUM”.  “What is that?” asked Ben.

“It’s our friend Reiny!” shouted Gwen.

“Stop! Abbegor.” said Reiny.

“Oh yeah!  My ultimatrix is working now.  It’s hero time!” Ben shouted and turned into Spider Monkey immediately.

So Reiny and Spider Monkey fought Abbegor at the same time.  Reiny hit the Abbegor’s head and also kicked Abbegor’s gut.  “BOOM”!  Spider Monkey shot some sticky slime on Abbegor.  At the very critical moment, there was a sound – “DI DI DI BOOM”!  Oh, the ultimatrix needed to be re-charged again and so Spider Monkey turned back to Ben.

Abbegor took the advantage and ordered his 17 robots to fight Ben and his friends.  Ben’s friends fought hard with the robots.  Gwen shot energy bolts to 5 robots.  Kevin hit 5 robots away.  Reiny also kicked away 4 robots.  The other 3 robots ran after Ben.  Ben managed to hit their head with some metal sticks.

Without letting Ben and his friends take any rest, Abbegor called for more DNAliens from the spaceship to fight them.  Ben quickly ran inside a building, went up the stairs and got a bomb.  Ben threw the bomb to the DNAliens.  Luckily, Ben’s ultimatrix was fully recharged at the time.

“It’s hero time again!” Ben shouted and turned into a Cannonbolt.

Cannonbolt was so powerful and smashed the DNAliens.  Abbegor also joined the battle to fight Cannonbolt.  After a long fight, Abbegor could not win Cannonbolt and therefore ran back to his spaceship.

“I will return!” Abbegor said and drove his spaceship away.

After that, Cannonbolt turned back to Ben.  “The mission is finished!” smiled Ben and his friends and they were back at the Plumbers HQs.  There, a Christmas Party prepared by Grandpa Max was waiting them!  Now, the earth was safe!!!

Runner Up: Devina Mahtani, P2, Kowloon Junior School, aged 6

Well done Devina for her funny story about a Santa with costume issues!

A Most Unusual Christmas  

Christmas Eve morning Santa decided he did not want to wear his Santa Suit while delivering the gifts, he wanted to dress in his Rock star Clothes. Then all of the elves were laughing at him saying, “You will look silly in that.” Then Santa said, “I want to look cool and make Christmas different this year!

So Santa wore his shiny silver Rock Star outfit and hopped onto his sleigh.  First he went to Asia, then to Europe and then he went to Australia, then Africa and then to the Arctic Ocean and South and North America.  Luckily no one saw him! Suddenly Santa started feeling itchy.  He started itching himself all over. “I miss my red cosy normal Santa outfit!” Santa said.  Luckily he had finished giving all the gifts to all the children around the world so he rushed back home.  He changed in his pajamas and went to bed. He bumped his head and couldn’t get up the next morning! Poor Santa!

Special additional place for the youngest entry: Annaëlle Mansuy, Class 1D, Kowloon Junior School, aged 5

A very special additional mention must be made for Annaelle’s story of a strange Christmas dream about moving snowmen:

A Most Unusual Christmas

Once, there was a boy called Sam. He made a snowman at Christmas. He was tired after making a snowman. He went to bed to sleep. His Christmas was not fun.

He had a dream. It was about moving snowmen. They made a Christmas tree. They sang around it. They had a party in the snow. They played and watched T.V. They ate cakes and they slept. Later, Santa came and gave toys to the snowmen. Then Sam woke up and ate his breakfast.

Age Group 8 to 11 years

It was very difficult to choose between the 26 entries in this age group – there was so much originality, humour and great style! Congratulations to Athena Tan of Australian International School and Hannah Platter of  Singapore American School in Singapore; in Hong Kong, Christopher Kwok of Discovery College; Keona Pang of Canadian International School; Tiffany Chen of Kiangsu Chekiang International School and Hayley Ko of Shatin Junior School; Sadithi DeZilva, Asuka Wakino, Felicity Yick, Lena Kim, Paco Chow, Yuti Khare, Jasmine Alberts, Carrie Chan, Masanori Naguya Wong, Simran Rungta, Paridhi Surana, Stefanie Ng, Lap Hei Chow, Jayesh Chatlani, John Pang and Shiven Dukhandes of Kowloon Junior School for some very entertaining stories – keep up the good work!

But there must be a winner! This month the winners in this age group are:

First place: Li Yan (Yan Yan) Wa, Class 5E, Canadian International School, aged 10.

Congratulations to Yan Yan for a hilarious story which really made me laugh! As well as being great fun to read, I was very impressed by Yan Yan’s mature and extensive vocabulary, her excellent dialogue, and the sheer inventiveness and originality of her story about a runaway nose!

A Most Unusual Christmas

On Christmas morning I got a dreadful cold. My forehead was burning, my nose ran like the Amazon River, and my throat was so dry I think my windpipe was replaced with extra-rough sandpaper.

So I went down to the kitchen to grab a quick drink. When I had finished and was just going to put the glass down, the windows began to shake and then I had this really weird feeling that I was being watched. I turned around, expecting it was my mom, but instead my nose fell off onto the floor!

Seconds right after it hit the ground the pink, teardrop shaped organ that once belonged to me ran up, up, up the staircase with me trailing behind it shouting “Come back! Come back!” and trying frantically to catch it at the same time. But each time when I leapt to catch it my nose nimbly dodged my hand and sprinted up the stairs two times faster than before.

My nose rounded a corner and went straight into- MY BATHROOM!

Oh no oh no ohno nononono! My heart raced as my nose turned the knob on the tap.

“AAAAGH!” I shrieked as the pink blob sky-dived into the pipe. Before I knew it I was head-first into the murky tap water. The last thing I saw before I was sucked away was my puny nose blissfully flying down, down, down into the tenebrous pipe.

“Ouch… where am I?” I rubbed my eyes wearily. “AIEEEE!”

Noses were everywhere around me. There were grotesque, distorted noses, there were sharp, pointy noses, there were noses of all types. All of them were scrutinizing me with their big, hairy nostrils. Out of the corner of my eyes I thought I saw my dear nose melting into the crowd.

“DON’T GO AWAY! Come back THIS INSTANT!” I made a desperate lunge for my nose but it ran away. I saw it open a minute door and slip in silently.

Frustrated, I ripped down the door and poked my head in. Five noses (including mine) were holding a quorum. When they saw me they froze and stared. Suddenly one of the noses who had a judge sort-of wig on the bridge of his nose screamed at me and pointed an accusing hair at me (since noses don’t have arms, let alone fingers.). “You are guilty!” it roared

“Wha-what?” I licked my dry lips. The judge-nose clicked its hairs and bellowed again, “You are guilty!” and adjusted its wig with a hair.

“For what?!” I asked, bewildered.

The nose cleared its throat and read out the charges on a piece of paper. “You are guilty,” it took a pause, and then continued, “Of blowing Jimmy so harshly on a tissue.” What! My nose was called Jimmy!? I never even knew my nose had a name! “Furthermore, you have spoiled this years’ Christmas Nosely Ritual, which is only held once every 10 years.”

I stood there, flabbergasted, and gawked at them.

“So what are we going to do with her?” The nose who was sitting across from the judge-nose cocked a hair.

“So what are you going to do with me?” I folded my arms.

“We’re going to lock you up in the dungeon, I’m afraid.” The one who was sitting in this meditative yoga state smiled wanly. My noses’ nostrils suddenly filled with tears (or probably snot). It fell on its hairs (again, noses don’t have knees) and pleaded to the judge-nose, “She isn’t that bad. Honest. Please don’t lock her up in the dungeon!!” Tears fell from its nostrils.

“Then what do we do with her?” the yoga-nose cried out.

The four noses fell into a hushed discussion. After a minute of conversation the judge-nose said, “You are allowed to join the ritual. Come.” It motioned for me and my nose to follow.

The nose led me and Jimmy through a myriad of hallways until we arrived in a high ceilinged room. Once again the ritualing noses gawked at me.

“Jimmy!” one yelled, “I never knew your owner would come! You’re so lucky!”

I could almost feel Jimmy blushing. (Except noses don’t blush.)

The judge-nose boomed out, “Jimmy’s owner will join the ritual today!” The noses cheered.

“Why is the ritual held?” I inquired.

Before the judge-nose could respond a nose wailed, “Yesterday my owner’s brother kicked me in the nostril! It hurts!!”

Everybody in the room gave it pitying glances.

“Don’t worry, no matter how big or small, all your pains will be relieved after the ritual!” another nose piped up.

“The ritual is to relieve the decade of pain they have received.” the judge-nose explained.

“ALL RIGHTO, LET’S BEGIN!” it announced.

Abruptly the noses formed a circle and held hairs. Hesitantly, I slipped between a nose who had a nose-ring and another one who was wearing a mini sunhat and grabbed the hairs. The noses started humming. At first it was only a slight buzz, but then it grew louder and louder until my ears were ringing with the noise. After that, the circle of noses spun on another one of their hairs like a top and I spun too, faster and faster until my head was spinning exactly like my body.

“RITUAL FINISHEDDD!” the judge-nose proclaimed the end of the ritual. “NOW LET’S OPEN OUR PRRRRESENTS!”   The crowd of noses stampeded out of the hallway. I followed. I entered a room piled with miniature presents. “Here’s one for you.” a voice startled me. It was my nose, Jimmy! He handed a larger present to me. “Wow, thanks!” I hugged my nose (or rather gave Jimmy a big squeeze with my right hand.)

“Come on now, let’s open our presents!” Jimmy hauled me over to a quiet spot.

Just as I was about to tear the wrapping paper the room morphed back into my kitchen. My present disappeared. “Hey! My present!” I yelled. Jimmy was gone. I felt my face for my nose. It was there, back in its normal spot.

“Yan Yan! Why are you here? You should be back in bed!” my mom puffed angrily.

“Sorry.” I muttered and went up the stairs, back to my bed.  To my surprise, the present was there. To Yan Yan, From Jimmy the label read. I ripped the present open.

“ARGHHH!” I shook my fist in fury. “A pack of so-called high quality tissues just for your own sake!”

Second place: Nicole Jiyang Evans, Grade 6, Kiangsu Chekiang International School, aged 10

I was touched by Nicole’s tender, well-written story about kindness at Christmas:

The Perfect Christmas

I couldn’t help but look into the window crying. She was just so lucky, getting all those presents every year, it was just like the Christmas I’d always wished for, but I knew it was never going to come.

Every Christmas Day, after the daily walk I’d have by myself, I’d usually walk past the girl’s window. I’d take a glimpse, and I would see my Christmas dream in front of my eyes. The girl, still dressed in her nightie, running down the stairs towards her presents, tearing them open, and screaming with happiness. I would just stare into the window, smiling weakly, and watch this Christmas routine happen every year. Then I would just walk home, sadly, wishing this was just a Christmas nightmare, but of course, it wasn’t.

When I got to the door step of our old and ugly house, I would yell for my sister to come open the door. And she always did, the kind and caring girl, with a smile that could melt chocolate, I loved her the absolute most in my family.

When it was time for bedtime, me and my sister would snuggle up together in our tiny bed and tell each other what we wished for Christmas. My sister wished for loads of things, like: jewels, toys, books, clothes and other stuff. And then she would ask me what I wished for, I would say “I don’t care what I get, I just want a present that can make me happy” My sister would just give me her beautiful smile, and say it will show up one day.

Most years, I’d climb out of bed on Boxing Day, run down stairs and make sure there wasn’t a present there waiting for me, but there was always nothing. This year, I did the same as usual, but found a present at the foot of the stairs with a note saying To Sandra .

I ran down the stairs like a rocket, wanting to have a look at my first Christmas present in my whole life. I didn’t want to open it straight away, even though I was bursting with excitement, instead, I shook it carefully. Inside me, I was flooding over with gratefulness, wishing that I knew who gave me this present.

At this moment, I noticed that my sister was looking at me with her beautiful smile, followed by a secret wink.

And suddenly I knew the perfect person to thank.

Third place: Adela Wu, Grade 5, Kowloon Junior School, aged 9

Adela’s story about a small Chinese village, a Jade Rabbit and an extraordinary talking fish is a wonderful tale of myth and magic, and is very impressive for a nine year old!

A Christmas Catch

Jenny was devastated! She was a small girl at the age of 12. She lived in a small village. There was a competition at Christmas. It was a fishing competition. Each person had to catch an amazing fish. The prize was a beautiful new scooter that could fold up. There was no limit on how much you had to catch.

The only problem for Jenny was that she was a very poor fisher. She didn’t catch a single fish for the whole week! The whole time she was filled with worry. Was her worm too small? Did she make a throw too soft?  Is the fishing hook too big?  Did her feet smell?  Her grandma says her socks should always be clean. Today, her fishing pole wiggled a bit and when she pulled it up, it was a boot with a hole in the front! That night as she tucked in her bed, she wished that she would really catch something truly extraordinary.

Not far away on the moon lived someone called the Jade rabbit. On the moon there was also the amethyst rabbit, the ruby rabbit, the emerald rabbit, the topaz rabbit and the sapphire rabbit. Each rabbit had a job to do on earth. For the Jade rabbit’s job was to help children fulfil their dreams. He had just come back from a place where he helped poor children fulfil their wish to be educated in school. He now got a message that a little girl called Jenny really needed his help.

That night when Jenny’s village was fast asleep, it was extraordinarily quiet except the snoring noise. The Jade rabbit crept down to earth. He put some magic dust into Jenny’s pole and grinned. He then quietly crept back to the moon.

The next morning, Jenny raced out of the house and dashed up the stairs. She sped down the great green hill towards the fishing lake. She thought to herself that she would catch a great big one today. She could feel it in her toes. It was because she spent one full hour washing her socks last night. Now her socks were bright and clean, she felt really confident. She sat down filled with determination to catch a fish.

She threw the fishing pole down into the lake and waited. After a while, she felt a tug on her pole. She was going to catch something at last! She hurriedly pulled her pole out. Instead of a fish, there sat a box, with a bow on the top. She rushed back home and saw her mom talking on the phone to the mayor. Jenny decided to open her box. She found a funny looking spiky green triangle inside. She pulled it, it didn’t come out. As she pulled harder, it grew bigger and bigger. Just as her mom hung up the phone, she pulled the whole thing out of the box. “What is that?!?!?”  Exclaimed her mum as she spotted that spiky green triangle that had turned into a giant Christmas tree.  Jenny started to explain how she caught “it” by the lake. But her mom cut her off and started to drag it towards the door. Jenny helped. Her mom explained that the mayor needed a Christmas tree urgently. He got the decorations ready but he didn’t get the tree. When Jenny and her mom got it to the middle of the town, the mayor was absolutely thrilled! After the decoration, the Christmas tree stood tall and looked stunning under the clear blue sky. That day Jenny felt proud though she did feel sad that she didn’t catch a fish. She told herself that she would catch one the next day.

The next day she caught another box. This time, inside the box were lots and lots of chopped pieces of wood. Jenny wondered whether she should keep those or carve them into fishes. By the time she reached the town, she saw that in the Half- A- Town –Square there were lots of villagers and a very distressed Mayor, all at alarm. The Mayor was trying to sort things out with the villagers. Everyone was freezing. Everyone wanted a warm and cosy house. Everyone wanted a nice green environment. Jenny stared hard at all the pieces of chopped up wood. She decided to give all the villagers some wood to burn for heat to keep warm. There were lots to go around. Everyone was happy and thanked Jenny. At the end of the day Jenny felt really happy but she felt more worried about her uncaught fish.

Each day she caught a different box with something inside that made more and more people happy. But, each day she got more and more worried.  She was afraid that she wouldn’t catch a fish to win the prize.

The very last day of the fishing competition had finally arrived. Jenny was feeling a little tense as she ran upwards toward the fishing place. She prayed for a good catch and as soon as she lowered down her pole, she found something pulling her line. Her heart was pumping and her toes were twitching. It was a fish! It looked shiny and gave out a glow of rainbow. It smiled at her! Then it began to talk! Jenny was so stunned, amazed and she was speechless. She didn’t know fishes could talk!

That day at the grand fishing contest, everyone had a splendid fish. Jenny was the last one to show up with her amazing catch. The Judges were stunned and everyone was speechless at the smiling talking fish. Everyone who Jenny helped was there too. They cheered for her kindness and her amazing catch. Sure enough, she was awarded the 1^st prize by the judges. Jenny happily rode home with the new foldable scooter.

The Jade rabbit made many children happy and she made Jenny happy. Are you kind and helpful? Are you making people happy? Will it be your turn next?

Honourable mention: Chance Emerson, Grade 5, Canadian International School, aged 11

Chance’s story about a rather cool Santa who rides a Harley Davidson is very well-written and terrific fun!

The Newfangled Santa

Vroom Vroom Boom! Vroom Vroom Boom! That was all I could hear while wrapping my presents this year. You might wonder why. So, I’ll tell you. It all started while I was asleep in my bed last year in November, nice and cosy under the blankets. Then, I heard a weird scratching noise at the window. I looked to see what it was and, well, it was Santa! But, he didn’t look anything like our fat St. Nick. He wore a white skin-tight shirt with high-class sunglasses, a leather jacket, blue jeans and the classic white and red suit over the rest of the clothes. But the one thing that stood out the most was the alleged sleigh. I mean really, Santa doesn’t ride a Harley Davidson, does he?

Slowly, the window opened. You’d think I’d be screaming in happiness, but really, who would jump for joy when a motorcycle-driving stranger just walked into your house. He patted the snow off his clothes, and then spoke “Okay… I know I just walked into your house but sorry, my Harley broke down as I was flying over Saskatchewan.” My mouth dropped. There were a million questions in my head but I started with a really dumb one. “You c-can talk??” He looked at me like I was being crazy and then slowly said, “Yes, I can talk, I’m a human being.” I sat down. “How are you going to get back to the Arctic?” I whispered.  He looked down and said “I’m not the real Santa; I’m just the one on loan while Santa’s on vacation. The only way to get me back to the Arctic is if I have a piece of sushi to start up my engine again” This night was getting weirder by the minute.

Sushi, sushi, sushi, where do I get sushi? This is America! Not Japan! Also, what kind of person would eat raw fish?? Just then, my dog nipped my shoe. It started talking. Was I surprised? No. I knew I ought to be, but it just wasn’t enough after all I’d been through. I mean, after you’ve seen a Harley Davidson that runs on raw fish and rice, a talking dog is just normal. It whispered to me, “I know where to get the best sushi in town. The old Shackle Inn. ‘Throws out a ton of the stuff into the dumpster every night and its only two bones for an all you can eat buffet. Tuna, Mackerel, Squid, Octopus, they got it all.” “Where’s the Shackle Inn?” I asked. “On the far corner of town, Shelley Street.” It replied. So hand in hand, a loaned Santa, a small brown dog, and a kid with an expression like he’d seen it all pushed a motorcycle, slowly, to Shelley Street.

An hour after dawn, as we were nearing Shelley Street, the loaned Santa stopped. With a grimace he said, “I only have a few hours left before I must be back at the Arctic. If I don’t make it, Santa won’t know when to come back and Christmas won’t come this year.” It was an apocalypse. No Christmas?? Why, Christmas was the very thing that kept us kids alive and kicking! We started running towards the inn and then we stopped. There was a fence, covered in barbed wire. My brown dog walked down the side of the fence and said “There’s a hole, but it’s small. Santa won’t fit, but you and I will.”

In we went. Inside, we were welcomed by a giant bloodhound, which graciously took us to our spot for eating. We ordered an all you can eat breakfast and got 4 pieces of sushi. At last we were done. We crawled through the hole in the fence without even paying a single bone a handed to Santa. He looked at it and smiled, tears came to his eyes and he thanked us the dog and I by giving us a present. And then, I don’t even need to say it but I will, Vroom Vroom Boom! The Harley took off into the air and left a long plume of fish flavoured smoke all the way until my eye couldn’t see it anymore.

So the dog and I were standing around, smiling, because we had saved Christmas. How do I know it wasn’t a dream? I know because every morning I wake up and see proof. Two glittering snow globes, with a loaned Santa, a small brown dog, and a kid with an expression like he’d seen it all inside of it.

Special mention for one of the youngest entrants: Navya Ahuja, Grade 4, Kowloon Junior School, aged 8

I loved this short, sweet and rather quirky tale about a prickly Christmas – well done Navya!

A Christmas That Was Prickliness

Once there was a Christmas that was prickliness.

A trouble that could not be popped like a bubble

and not as cosy as a cuddle .

Some days before Christmas a witch was taking Santa’s place drinking fanta. And was planning to start banning children from getting presents and keeping them for herself!

Oh no poor children, doing home work all the time, while the Witch wickedly says that the presents are all mine.

The witch says “Ok now I can go to rest”.

Then Santa Claus sees in his magic globe that the children are sad. “How come?” he said, surprised. He immediately went to his office and said “Oh my goodness me! A witch!”

He was angry and when Santa was angry nobody would get a single candy.

Then the witch started sending burning and prickly chairs floating in the air! Then Santa called his assistant who was a fairy who could fly in the air. She used her magic to make the witch lose her powers.

Yes! The chairs floated to the witch. Ouch! She was already stressed thinking what to do next.

Suddenly she turned into a pretty princess who had a cute kitty. Then she told them the story about how the jealous mean witch switched places.

Santa destroyed the real witch. And the pretty princess said thanks to his glory.  Just like happy endings.

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CLEVER COMPETITION NUMBER EIGHT: RABBIT POEM COMPETITION

Well hello there again! Here’s Rhonda Rabbit to congratulate you on your fabulous entries into my Rabbit Poem Competition to celebrate the Year of the Rabbit! We had an amazing response, with entries from 140 kids from a total of 18 schools in Hong Kong, Singapore, Shanghai, Taiwan, London and even one from India!

There was every kind of poem: acrostics, haikus, free verse, rhyming verse and some great limericks. Some poems were even a combination of two or more of these!

And never have I read about so many different types of rabbit! There were the usual cute, cuddly and fluffy bunnies of course; but there were also wild, wicked and insane rabbits; alien bunnies; Super Bunnies; Bolivian bunnies; Easter bunnies; man-eating bunnies; spy rabbits; jive bunnies; even, dare I say it, some rabbits called Rhonda!

Needless to say it was very hard choosing the best! I was looking primarily for good poetic style overall, excellent vocabulary and visual imagery. And of course your poem could be no longer than 16 lines.

So here, without more ado, are the winners of Competition Number 8!

FOUR TO SEVEN YEARS OLD CATEGORY

There were 31 wonderful entries into this section.

FIRST PLACE: goes to Kristen Kwan, Kowloon Junior School, Hong Kong, Class 2T, 6 years old.   I thought this poem was such a lovely evocation of the joys of Spring, and I could just picture that bunny’s travels!

SPRING IN VANCOUVER

Little bunny hopped down the valley Down the river On top of the hill Through the cave And under the bridge There – she found a butterfly On top of a flower Red, blue, pink and purple Beautiful like a rainbow Fa la la la la la la Sweet smell, apple sauce I love spring in Vancouver!

I loved this poem. The rhyming was spot on, but it was also such a wistful reminder of how much kids long to have their very own pet.

I WANT A BUNNY

I wish I could have a bunny as my pet, I would pat it all day long. I would feed it lots of fruits and vegetables, And feed it till it’s strong. Bunnies are my favourite pet, I wish I could have many more. I love them because they’re cuddly and cute, And hop around to explore. I would love it so much if I had one. I hope it would love me. If it would I would be so happy. I would love it more if it was a she. I want a bunny that is pink and white And sweet like honey. With cute brown eyes, and floppy ears, I really really want a bunny.

I thought this was a classic bunny poem, with such a touching description of everything we love about bunnies…the cute and fluffy ones, that is!!

MY BUNNY

I love my soft toy bunny He helps me go to sleep I hold him tight, through out the night To keep away bad dreams.   He is white and fluffy Cozy and cuddly too With big pink ears, with which he hears Me and you.   He loves to eat carrots, So crunchy and sweet He finds them very yummy, In his little tummy Every time he eats His eyes are black and brown So tiny and round I love him so dearly, Which you can see clearly My sweet little bunny and me.

I thought this acrostic about the Year of the Rabbit was very clever, if a little mercenary! But we all know what kids really like about Chinese New Year!! RED ENVELOPE MONEY Red envelope Almost Bursting with Bucks I can’t wait Til’ I get it!

RUNNERS UP: the following entries won the six runner-up positions – well done all of you! Colin Yap, Singapore American School, Singapore, Grade 2, 7 years old

There was a rabbit who thought he was lucky. But who one day got terribly mucky. The tiger said, DUDE, You’re in an angry mood And you’re definitely going to taste yucky.

Bunny Rabbit you’re so white I love your fur so nice and bright It feels like snow so soft and light

Wing Kiu Lau, Renaissance College, Hong Kong, Class 2SK

LITTLE RABBIT

Little rapid rabbit runs quickly Little running rabbit races happily Little restless rabbit rushes hurriedly

Little reddish rabbit rejoices whole-heartedly.

Livia Korng, Renaissance College, Hong Kong, Grade 3, 7 yoa

WHO AM I?

Snow white color. Soft cuddly fur. Long black whiskers. Pink button nose. Powerful hind legs. Fluffy bushy tail. Long upright ears. Big red eyes.

Parul Methi, Kowloon Junior School, Hong Kong, Grade 2, 7 years old

THE BOUNCY BUNNY

Cuddly little bunnies like to hop around, With little brown noses that sniff all about. They like to nibble on carrots Their teeth go chop,chop,chop Their fur is like a blanket of white snow And eyes little diamonds, With floppy ears and bouncy feet

Antony Yip, Kowloon Junior School, Hong Kong, Class 2R, 6 years old

GREEN BUNNY

A cute fluffy bunny Lived happily in Green Planet Thought life was so funny Fell with a bump to Earth   His eyes suddenly turned red And noise echoed in the long ears Of poor bunny Fred His lungs full of polluted air   His twitchy nose shook And Fred sneezed His floppy ears looked Rather sad and droopy   Scared friendly bunny Called his mummy And she rescued Fred

Back to nice Green Planet

SPECIAL MENTION; this is a special award for the two youngest entrants into the competition – just 5 years of age! They each wrote a wonderful poem and deserve a great big CONGRATULATIONS! Haris Tahir, Valence Primary School, London, Grade 1, 5 years old

I love rabbits. They are cool. They are fuzzy. And they are so soft. They have fat tails. They are so fat. Rabbits like carrots. Rabbits are very adorable. They are cute. And very quiet. Andrea Grace Lam, Kowloon Junior School, Grade 1, 5 years old

ALINA AND MINA

Once upon a time, there is a gentle bunny.  Her name is Alina. She loves to read and loves to bounce. One day Alina met a little girl.  Her name is Mina. Mina likes to sing and likes to dance. Alina and Mina became good friends. Alina reads while Mina sings. Mina dances and Alina bounces. The sun is setting and the wind is blowing. Time flies and it’s time to say bye-bye.

There were no less than 129 entries into this section of the Competition! There were so many great entries, so it was very hard to pick the winning ten. Here they are in order:

FIRST PLACE: goes to Jason Spaeth, TASIS England School, UK, Grade 4, 10 years old   This poem stood out for many reasons. The alliteration was clever, the vocabulary excellent, the imagery funny and very appealing. An original rhyme reminiscent of Dr Seuss at his best!

RODNEY RABBIT RIDES RHINOS

Rodney Rabbit rides rhinos every single day, Riding rhinos make him radical in every single way. While he rides, he raps out rhymes, His rhythms ring throughout the times. Rodney’s rhythms make the rhino want to race to Rome, With Rodney riddling riddles all the way back home.

SECOND PLACE: goes to Yan Wa Li (Yan Yan), Canadian International School Hong Kong, Grade 5, 10 years old   Yan Yan’s free verse was just wonderful – I could almost see her rabbit peeping from behind the rock. I loved the visual imagery, especially the “red crystal eyes” and the strong hind legs “pumping”. Congratulations again Yan Yan on another terrific effort.

RABBIT FREE VERSE

A pair of Fluffy Ears Pokes out behind a Rock Red Crystal Eyes Peep And then Disappear. Then A Whole Head Pops out Rises Higher And Higher Short, Chubby arms feel the rock The nose sniffs the air Strong Hind Legs Pump A Rabbit is here!

This poem was funny and cleverly rhymed, and it made me laugh! A great entry again from Chance – well done!

HELP ME! THERE’S A RABBIT!

There’s a rabbit at my door! There’s a rabbit in my floor! They’re cute, cuddly and evil. That one’s devising a big plan, To blow up Amsterdam! That one’s mixing soap together, To alternate the weather!   That one’s practicing his aim, By shooting bullets at my brain!   That one’s striking deals with the devil, To raise the world’s sea level! There’s a rabbit at my door! There’s a rabbit in my floor! They’re cute, cuddly and evil.

Anna’s acrostic poem was very skilful, with excellent vocabulary and some lovely imagery.

Blazing snow white from head to toe Understanding, intelligent, a delight to know Neat as ever, pleasant, so charming Never ever nasty or rude, a smile so disarming Youthful, always determined and very fluffy indeed.

RUNNERS UP: the following entries won the six runner-up positions – well done all of you!

 Janil Patel, Kowloon Junior School, Class 4A, 8 years old.

MY RABBIT                                             

My rabbit loves to hop. He hops from here to there all the way to the other side of the garden. He’ll stand up tall, on his hind legs, and will smell the sky. He listens, and scans the garden, making sure all is safe. Then he goes back to hopping in search of

Andrew Norlin, TASIS England School, UK, Grade 4, 10 years old.

RUSTY THE RABBIT

Rusty the rabbit wasn’t really rusty, Unlike others, Rusty could speed along, Sizzling the street with fire, Till he returns home, You probably think he’d rest, but instead he…. Runs! Acts! Bikes! Bounces In his small hut,

Idan, Chatsworth International School Orchard, Singapore, Year 4

RABBIT POEM

A hopping beast

A fluffy mammal

A powerful eater

A shy pest

A cute lover

A hairy pet

Lena Kim, Kowloon Junior School, Class 6K, 10 years old

BUNNY POEM

There once was a bunny who just loved honey,

He ate it all night and day.

He loved it with gummy, it was so very yummy,

The best thing on earth he would say.

 It was often quite tricky because it was sticky,

Sometimes it fell where he sat.

Even the ground he would licky so it wouldn’t get icky,

That’s how he got really fat.

You might think this bunny is a little bit funny,

Someone should tell him to stop.

But putting all that honey into his big fat old tummy,

Gives him energy to jump, run and hop!

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CLEVER COMPETITION NUMBER NINE: A HAIKU FOR SPRING

Wow – the Spring Haiku Competition was the biggest competition yet! What a wonderful way to celebrate the coming of Spring! There were a total of 207 entries from 14 schools in Hong Kong, Shanghai and Singapore this time and judging them all was very difficult indeed!

Sometimes the poems that look easiest to write are actually the hardest – and in this case, the challenge was to make your entry stand out from hundreds about the same subject! Firstly it was essential to meet the basic requirements of the Competition –unfortunately I had to reject some truly lovely poems this time, either because they weren’t about Spring or because they didn’t follow the rules about syllable count per line in a traditional Haiku; 5, 7, 5.  After that, I was looking for originality of expression, imagery and feeling. 

Here are the winners!

Grade 1 to Grade 3 Category

First place: Isha Bhojwani, Class 3C, Kowloon Junior School

–  Isha Bhowjani’s poem was wonderful – very personal, witty and completely different to any other poem in the competition! Well done Isha for your very original take on the subject of Spring – and I do hope that you’ve recovered from your chicken pox by now! Here is what Isha wrote to me:

Dear Sarah Brennan,

My name is Isha Bhojwani.  I’m in 3C and go to KJS.  I’ve written a haiku about spring and about what I had in spring. This haiku is true and shows my perspective about spring.  I learned that spring is the peak season for chicken-pox.  That’s what I got this spring.

This is my haiku:

How is Spring pleasant?

With chicken pox and flu-shots

That’s all I have got!

Springtime

Feel the wing in you

Smell the grass, the tree hauhu

Third place: Kenny Huang, Grade 2, Shanghai American School, MinHang district

– What a wonderful description of Spring – Spring is a lady – well done Kenny!

Spring

Spring is colorful

Flowers bloom, bumblebees fly

Spring is a lady.

Growth, wind, nature rules!

Warmth, greenery, specialness

Birds and beginnings.

Runners-Up

And congratulations to the following six students for their wonderful entries – especially given their young ages – well done!

Emilie Guan, Grade 1, Shanghai American School, Puxi Campus.

Pretty flowers swoosh

In the warm April breezes

Bees gather nectar

Everything changes

Flowers blossom in the grass

Bees buzz busily.

Wonders Of Spring

Gone are the cold nights

The dark skies and gloomy days

Manas Chugani, Class 2R, Kowloon Junior School

Spring Birth

Planting seeds in soil

My baby sister is born

Cherry Blossoms too.

Jessica Qian, Grade 1CN, Shanghai American School

Spring

Flowers grow pretty

Butterflies dance in the air

Fresh green grass wakes up.

Wing Kiu Lau, Year 2, Renaissance College Hong Kong

Spring in Nippon

No more disasters!

Cherry Blossom Festival

Bless the Japanese.

Special mention must be made of  the youngest entrant in the competition! Congratulations Karina Bhojwani of Kowloon Junior School for a truly excellent effort for a 5 year old!

First Haiku of Spring

Of the four seasons,

I like Spring because flowers

Blossom and birds sing.

GRADE 4 TO GRADE 6 CATEGORY

First place: Christy Chan, 8 years old, Miss Gibson’s class, Christian Alliance International School.

I loved this poem with its reference to bees drawing near a daydreamer. Well done Christy for a terrific poem – what a great young writer!

Lilacs are blooming

The beauty makes you daydream

Drawing the bees near.

Spring

The leaves open up

Like happiness in our hearts

Stepping into Spring

Flowers bloom, bees buzz

Trees stretch up toward the sky

Happy and hopeful.

Runners-Up

Congratulations also to the six Runners-Up!

Hyerin Oh, Grade 4, Christian Alliance International School

Seeing robins fly

Makes me feel happy and free

So free that I smile.

Bianca Chui, Class 6J Christian Alliance International Alliance School

Rejoice

Spring has come, my friend!

Forget all sad winter days,

Rachel Scott, Grade 6 Christian Alliance International School

The New Life Called Spring

Children frolicking

It is the first day of spring

First day of laughter

Wakino Asuka, Class 6W, Kowloon Junior School

Sakuras for Spring

Sweet, simple, beautiful, pure

Graceful sakura.

Soccer Days

Spring days, soccer games

Players running in the breeze

But watch for the bees!